Comments on: Anguished Mom: The MSSD Perpetrator is a Victim, too http://www.mishkazena.com/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/ Just another WordPress weblog Thu, 11 Feb 2010 13:59:03 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 hourly 1 By: Burbanari http://www.mishkazena.com/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/comment-page-1/#comment-4296 Burbanari Tue, 30 Oct 2007 20:26:51 +0000 http://blog.deafread.com/mishkazena/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/#comment-4296 You don't really need or want that lifestyle, it might hurt y'all slowly more.......Just tell him you don't wanna repeat something your not too proud of z7uas. You don’t really need or want that lifestyle, it might hurt y’all slowly more…….Just tell him you
don’t wanna repeat something your not too proud of z7uas.

]]> By: concerned http://www.mishkazena.com/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/comment-page-1/#comment-4294 concerned Thu, 18 Oct 2007 02:26:17 +0000 http://blog.deafread.com/mishkazena/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/#comment-4294 Hello... I have been reading a lot of blogs and v-logs for a couple of weeks and we all need to be careful on how we make comments about the boys. Many of you just judge quickly by hearing from the media, blogs, and vlogs. Most news are twisted and exaggerated. I see that many of you do not know the whole truth.. only the boys' parents or even a grandma know the truth. They are deeply concerned and hurt from some nasty comments. The Adminstrators really did not do a great job handling the whole situation. No parent is perfect! Most parents do try to teach their children family values and other things. We all try to teach our children but sometime we do forget some important issues to teach our children or sometime we assume they do know what is right or wrong. Kids do make mistakes and I beleive that it is okay for kids to make mistakes and learn from them. We adults all make or have made mistakes in our lives, too. Yes, I beleive and hope that the 7 boys have learned from their mistakes and will move on... but my biggest questions are listed here.. what about the other 7 black boys??... why arent they punished? Why are they allowed to be free? They got into a fist fight and they did beat up a white boy on the other group?? Did they really learn about this? I doubt this because the Adminstrators did not do anything with this group.. they will do it again and maybe next time they wont be lucky to be alive because they did not learn anything. It wasnt only one victim who was upset. He voluntarily participated in this game and even laughed along with the group. There WERE many victims in both groups who got hurt from this.This whole thing led to a fist fight due to a misunderstanding. This would not even happen if the RA or dorm staff was around every 15 minutes to check the boys from 1 to 4 AM. What's even more is that the 14 BOYS met together the next morning and worked their problems out!!!! WHat does that tell you?? Here are my comments to those 14 victims' parents/grandparents... you all are wonderful parents who obviously show me that you do care for your sons. Yes they made several mistakes by using those racial names to be used as teams and breaking rules to play at 1 am, etc. Please do not take other people's comments seriously or personally. The key now is to keep your communication open with your sons and discuss more often about things that are right or wrong openly. The boys need you to be supportive and strong for them.... The boys need to move on now and get the best education somewhere else. Concerned Hello… I have been reading a lot of blogs and v-logs for a couple of weeks and we all need to be careful on how we make comments about the boys. Many of you just judge quickly by hearing from the media, blogs, and vlogs. Most news are twisted and exaggerated. I see that many of you do not know the whole truth.. only the boys’ parents or even a grandma know the truth. They are deeply concerned and hurt from some nasty comments. The Adminstrators really did not do a great job handling the whole situation.

No parent is perfect! Most parents do try to teach their children family values and other things. We all try to teach our children but sometime we do forget some important issues to teach our children or sometime we assume they do know what is right or wrong. Kids do make mistakes and I beleive that it is okay for kids to make mistakes and learn from them. We adults all make or have made mistakes in our lives, too.

Yes, I beleive and hope that the 7 boys have learned from their mistakes and will move on… but my biggest questions are listed here.. what about the other 7 black boys??… why arent they punished? Why are they allowed to be free? They got into a fist fight and they did beat up a white boy on the other group?? Did they really learn about this? I doubt this because the Adminstrators did not do anything with this group.. they will do it again and maybe next time they wont be lucky to be alive because they did not learn anything. It wasnt only one victim who was upset. He voluntarily participated in this game and even laughed along with the group. There WERE many victims in both groups who got hurt from this.This whole thing led to a fist fight due to a misunderstanding. This would not even happen if the RA or dorm staff was around every 15 minutes to check the boys from 1 to 4 AM. What’s even more is that the 14 BOYS met together the next morning and worked their problems out!!!! WHat does that tell you??

Here are my comments to those 14 victims’ parents/grandparents… you all are wonderful parents who obviously show me that you do care for your sons. Yes they made several mistakes by using those racial names to be used as teams and breaking rules to play at 1 am, etc. Please do not take other people’s comments seriously or personally. The key now is to keep your communication open with your sons and discuss more often about things that are right or wrong openly. The boys need you to be supportive and strong for them…. The boys need to move on now and get the best education somewhere else.

Concerned

]]> By: No Name http://www.mishkazena.com/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/comment-page-1/#comment-4295 No Name Tue, 16 Oct 2007 23:54:17 +0000 http://blog.deafread.com/mishkazena/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/#comment-4295 dee, Take easy. I am only speaking out with the plain truth. "Parents it is time for you to change" You are correct. My parents DID change from school to other school for me to study therefore your recently comment is pointless. I repeat, "Take easy". dee,

Take easy. I am only speaking out with the plain truth.

“Parents it is time for you to change”

You are correct. My parents DID change from school to other school for me to study therefore your recently comment is pointless.

I repeat, “Take easy”.

]]> By: dee http://www.mishkazena.com/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/comment-page-1/#comment-4293 dee Sun, 14 Oct 2007 18:21:17 +0000 http://blog.deafread.com/mishkazena/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/#comment-4293 I am flabergasted here. One commenter #13 puts the blame on Oral education. Another blames the administration. These are typical reactions by people who do not want to take responsibility. Responsiblity for how a child acts starts at HOME. That's right parents, you have had the opportunity to raise you children to treat other people with RESPECT. If you failed to do this then the blame is on YOU not the administration, oral education, or whatever other enitity you can conjure up. Everyone needs to be held responsible for there actions. This means the children, the product of their parents, included. Racism is a terrible thing full of hate. There is enough hate in this world. Stop blaming others and making up excuses, look in the mirror. I am tired of parents defending the children they have sculpted into them. Children are a mirror what they were brought up in. Parents it is time for you to change, NO ONE ELSE. I am flabergasted here. One commenter #13 puts the blame on Oral education. Another blames the administration. These are typical reactions by people who do not want to take responsibility.

Responsiblity for how a child acts starts at HOME. That’s right parents, you have had the opportunity to raise you children to treat other people with RESPECT. If you failed to do this then the blame is on YOU not the administration, oral education, or whatever other enitity you can conjure up.

Everyone needs to be held responsible for there actions. This means the children, the product of their parents, included.

Racism is a terrible thing full of hate. There is enough hate in this world.

Stop blaming others and making up excuses, look in the mirror.

I am tired of parents defending the children they have sculpted into them. Children are a mirror what they were brought up in. Parents it is time for you to change, NO ONE ELSE.

]]> By: Angela Valdez http://www.mishkazena.com/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/comment-page-1/#comment-4292 Angela Valdez Sun, 14 Oct 2007 14:28:37 +0000 http://blog.deafread.com/mishkazena/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/#comment-4292 To the grandmother: I am working on a story for the Washington City Paper about this incident and the way the school has handled it. I have spoken with the anguished mom and her son and with several MSSD grads. From what I can tell, the game did not begin with racist intentions. I would love to talk or email with you -- or with your grandson's parents. I think this story has been simplified and misconstrued in the national media. I'd like to take a step back, talk about what really happened and whether the school's reaction has been appropriate. I can definitely keep your grandson's name out of the paper. You can reach me at avaldez@washingtoncitypaper.com Thanks, Angela Valdez To the grandmother:
I am working on a story for the Washington City Paper about this incident and the way the school has handled it. I have spoken with the anguished mom and her son and with several MSSD grads. From what I can tell, the game did not begin with racist intentions. I would love to talk or email with you — or with your grandson’s parents. I think this story has been simplified and misconstrued in the national media. I’d like to take a step back, talk about what really happened and whether the school’s reaction has been appropriate.

I can definitely keep your grandson’s name out of the paper.

You can reach me at avaldez@washingtoncitypaper.com

Thanks,
Angela Valdez

]]> By: Shirley Palmer http://www.mishkazena.com/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/comment-page-1/#comment-4291 Shirley Palmer Sat, 13 Oct 2007 22:08:29 +0000 http://blog.deafread.com/mishkazena/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/#comment-4291 Dear Mother, I am the grandmother of one of the boys in this incident. and yes, he is also a victim.; and it seems all the boys tell a different version of what happened. When the school sent their report here, on Wed. there were several statements which were not the same as he has been telling. Tell me,what do U think of kids running all over the dorm at 1:00 A.M? They definitely were not monitored, even if it WAS on the weekend!! In this case, this grandson was out of the room when the questioning was going on, "playing" with others in the halls. If the captured boy was masked, as I was told, how could he have seen your son, questioning him? and how would he KNOW who had hit him? This, it seems was re-enacting what they may have seen on TV shows. not RIGHT, of course.and I am sure that these boys do not TRULY know the true story of KKK or of the Nazi regime horrors. It would have been a greater lesson to these boys, to have been suspended a few days, and returned, and to have been taught exactly what this meant to black people, and to LEARN , with all the others, compassion, understanding, diversity.yhroughout the whole school. These boys, as well as the captured boy, will carry the scars, well into College and work,for their juvenile, thoughtless behavior... and in some cases, for the fact that they truly did not understand what they were doing as deliberately WRONG.15 yr. old boys do not KNOW restraint!! We MAY find that there IS racism there. Then it must be faced and there should be studies these children should take,Throughout the school, from KG thru grade 12. This is where it starts. I am deeply sorry for your son... and for my grandson. It is my hope that the administration will study this well, and give them a new chance. Dear Mother,
I am the grandmother of one of the boys in this incident. and yes, he is also a victim.;
and it seems all the boys tell a different version of what happened.
When the school sent their report here, on Wed. there were several statements which were not the same as he has been telling.
Tell me,what do U think of kids running all over the dorm at 1:00 A.M? They definitely were not monitored, even if it WAS on the weekend!!
In this case, this grandson was out of the room when the questioning was going on, “playing” with others in the halls.
If the captured boy was masked, as I was told, how could he have seen your son, questioning him? and how would he KNOW who had hit him?
This, it seems was re-enacting what they may have seen on TV shows. not RIGHT, of course.and I am sure that these boys do not TRULY know the true story of KKK or of the Nazi regime horrors.
It would have been a greater lesson to these boys, to have been suspended a few days, and returned, and to have been taught exactly what this meant to black people, and to LEARN , with all the others, compassion, understanding, diversity.yhroughout the whole school.
These boys, as well as the captured boy, will carry the scars, well into College and work,for their juvenile, thoughtless behavior… and in some cases, for the fact that they truly did not understand what they were doing as deliberately WRONG.15 yr. old boys do not KNOW restraint!!
We MAY find that there IS racism there. Then it must be faced and there should be studies these children should take,Throughout the school, from KG thru grade 12. This is where it starts.
I am deeply sorry for your son… and for my grandson.
It is my hope that the administration will study this well, and give them a new chance.

]]> By: cm http://www.mishkazena.com/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/comment-page-1/#comment-4290 cm Wed, 10 Oct 2007 13:10:49 +0000 http://blog.deafread.com/mishkazena/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/#comment-4290 I do agree with those of you who say my son should have been taught about culture and discrimination. As a parent, we don't know everything and do the best we can with what we have and know. Hind sight is 20/20 and I wish I had been able to see the future and recognize the need to discuss these issues with my son. Clearly that was my responsibility in which, however unintentional, I failed him as his mother in regards to this issue. I don't know what happens next and although my son didn't understand what he was involved in, I agree with some discipline as well as educating him now. He did get involved and should be taught that it was wrong that is how children learn I think. Initially, the punishment was a 5 day suspension which although harsh, I agreed with because it clearly stated that this situation was not good but the next step seems to be teaching rather than expulsion. The parents, educators and communities of these children should come together in an effort to insure that these young people have a clearer understanding of racism and acceptance of all human beings. Although I believe that I have been the best mother I knew how to be, sometimes as parents we need help in raising and teaching. I am frustrated by MSSD decision to expel these students rather than discipline and educate. MSSD is in a position now to positively impact the entire student population but working with the students and parents to teach the students compassion, caring and tolerance of all people. When people make mistakes out of ignorance, it is best if they can learn from the mistake and grow as people. As a parent, I learned that I should not have taken for granted that my son understood culture and diversity, that was my mistake. Therefore it is now up to me to educate him in diversity and also to educate him so that he understands that when other people are involved in things that are not right, he must walk away and tell someone. I need to insure that he understands the values and then teach him to take a stance for what is right. I do agree with those of you who say my son should have been taught about culture and discrimination. As a parent, we don’t know everything and do the best we can with what we have and know. Hind sight is 20/20 and I wish I had been able to see the future and recognize the need to discuss these issues with my son. Clearly that was my responsibility in which, however unintentional, I failed him as his mother in regards to this issue. I don’t know what happens next and although my son didn’t understand what he was involved in, I agree with some discipline as well as educating him now. He did get involved and should be taught that it was wrong that is how children learn I think. Initially, the punishment was a 5 day suspension which although harsh, I agreed with because it clearly stated that this situation was not good but the next step seems to be teaching rather than expulsion. The parents, educators and communities of these children should come together in an effort to insure that these young people have a clearer understanding of racism and acceptance of all human beings. Although I believe that I have been the best mother I knew how to be, sometimes as parents we need help in raising and teaching. I am frustrated by MSSD decision to expel these students rather than discipline and educate. MSSD is in a position now to positively impact the entire student population but working with the students and parents to teach the students compassion, caring and tolerance of all people. When people make mistakes out of ignorance, it is best if they can learn from the mistake and grow as people. As a parent, I learned that I should not have taken for granted that my son understood culture and diversity, that was my mistake. Therefore it is now up to me to educate him in diversity and also to educate him so that he understands that when other people are involved in things that are not right, he must walk away and tell someone. I need to insure that he understands the values and then teach him to take a stance for what is right.

]]> By: Angela Valdez http://www.mishkazena.com/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/comment-page-1/#comment-4274 Angela Valdez Tue, 09 Oct 2007 19:12:47 +0000 http://blog.deafread.com/mishkazena/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/#comment-4274 To the mom: I am a reporter at the Washington City Paper here in DC. I've thought from the beginning that there was more to this story than the sensational cries about racism. Your son's story sounds particularly complicated. He did something wrong but he's a victim too, and his history in the education system has a lot to do with it. I would love to learn more about his experience, and yours. You can reach me at avaldez@washingtoncitypaper.com I'd be happy to keep you and your son's name out of the paper. To the mom: I am a reporter at the Washington City Paper here in DC. I’ve thought from the beginning that there was more to this story than the sensational cries about racism. Your son’s story sounds particularly complicated. He did something wrong but he’s a victim too, and his history in the education system has a lot to do with it. I would love to learn more about his experience, and yours. You can reach me at avaldez@washingtoncitypaper.com
I’d be happy to keep you and your son’s name out of the paper.

]]> By: kbjensen06 http://www.mishkazena.com/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/comment-page-1/#comment-4275 kbjensen06 Tue, 09 Oct 2007 13:38:27 +0000 http://blog.deafread.com/mishkazena/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/#comment-4275 I feel bad for the student and mother. We can't change what has happened but what are we going to do to change the future as a whole community? I feel bad for the student and mother. We can’t change what has happened but what are we going to do to change the future as a whole community?

]]> By: Concerned http://www.mishkazena.com/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/comment-page-1/#comment-4276 Concerned Tue, 09 Oct 2007 11:34:30 +0000 http://blog.deafread.com/mishkazena/2007/10/08/anguished-mom-the-black-mssd-perpetrator-is-a-victim-too/#comment-4276 Sighs, we cannot blame the mother and the son because of the Oral education were not bright education for the Deaf. Concerned about some of single mothers who had been struggling with more than 1 job or 2 jobs without having child supported from the ex-husband. That's hard life to deal for some single mother of Deaf son in oral education. I remembered that the couple with a Deaf little girl who arrived in America from Haiti. Some how the parents do not SPEAK English so well and had no job. They could not afford to pay the electric bills and other bills. So they used the candles. All of hearing children were alived except for one Deaf girl with CI user died in a fire! Sad, huh? Sighs, we cannot blame the mother and the son because of the Oral education were not bright education for the Deaf.

Concerned about some of single mothers who had been struggling with more than 1 job or 2 jobs without having child supported from the ex-husband. That’s hard life to deal for some single mother of Deaf son in oral education.

I remembered that the couple with a Deaf little girl who arrived in America from Haiti. Some how the parents do not SPEAK English so well and had no job. They could not afford to pay the electric bills and other bills. So they used the candles. All of hearing children were alived except for one Deaf girl with CI user died in a fire! Sad, huh?

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